Giving it my all.

Today has been an awesome day. It started off QUICK with a rush to finish getting ready and heading to Bolsa Grande High School where the volunteers for the annual Tet Festival were. I met up with Jacqueline and we signed up for the same days. Don't forget Jacqueline! Wednesday and Friday. [: I've always wanted to volunteer ever since last year because it seemed like sooo much fun. Also, I won't be able to volunteer for anything like this so might as well go for it. [:

Soon, Nicole and I headed to Irvine Jamboree. It was sort of slow because the whole rest of the group didn't show up yet. D: But about 2 hours later (LOL) James, Darcy, Victoria, and Vivan appeared. Then when we headed into the karaoke center, Thomas, Eric, and Brian showed up. We all got set up and seated. Then the singing began! I was sort of timid and wasn't sure of what to sing but I decided "What the heck. These people are awesome and open. Why need to kill off my own fun?" So I picked a few songs and sang as loud as I could. It was TOTALLY worth it and fun in the end. And in the end, I made a few friends who are outrageously AWESOME. I'm so glad I made the effort to sing and open up to these them. [:

Right after Irvine Jamboree, I had a plan of taking my friend J0na to the beach. After picking him up, it felt like FOREVER going down to the beach on Magnolia. Maybe because there were no turns or anything. Well, when we got there, we walked straight to the water. I was NOT planning to get the ends of my jeans wet but about 2 minutes after thinking that, my feet were drenched, followed by my jeans. After that, I didn't care anymore. I stepped deeper and in the end, most of my legs were soaked. I listened to the waves crash and I loved it. I've never been to the beach when it wasn't a bonfire before. It was fantastic. And I had tons of fun moments with J0na. That also made it worth while. It was a nice one hour just playing with the sand and stepping into the ocean. I was actually about to not ask J0na to go with me because I thought it would be totally weird. But I just thought "Hey, are there any reasons why I shouldn't ask and go? If he says no, then so what? I'll just go by myself." I've wanted to go to the beach this weekend. And I told myself I would. And I did. But I really am glad a friend came along.

Telling others how I feel isn't an easy thing; let it be if I like someone, hate someone, or not giving a care for someone. The hardest one would have to be telling someone I like him. Words don't come out right, I take forever to say it, and if I'm face to face with him, I start fidgeting and trying to laugh it off as no big deal. Especially when I have somewhat of a story behind it. And one of those "dang it" feelings far deep inside is when I see that obviously he doesn't feel the same. But hey, what can I do, you know? I'm not going to obsess over anything and make him like me. That's just wrong. So I shrug it off and assume that it's just not going to work. Especially if he's a friend. I don't want to lose a friendship over stupid feelings I have. It's just ridiculous. The only thing I'm afraid of and don't like is if there is awkwardness. Andd. .. if there is, and there's an intense amount of it, I just let it be. Step away from the friendship and let go. Because maybe sometimes those awkward moments just never heal up and it just doesn't feel right anymore, no matter how long it takes.
But I guess I give it my all if at a point, I feel like I need to tell the person I do like him and watch for the make-or-break moment.

Well anyways, overall, this weekend has been pretty good. [: I'm hoping I can have more enjoyable weekends like this.

"What would life be if we had no courage to attempt anything?"
-- Vincent van Gogh